MojoMable.com

This evening, I am introducing Ben to the great wonder that is Three Amigos. This made me curious as to what the cast of The Three Amigos is up to these days. If they are up to anything at all.

Chevy Chase (Dusty Bottoms): Chevy Chase decided it would be an awesome idea to sort of stop being funny a little while after Three Amigos. For instance, in 2001, he worked on a gem called Vacuums. And in 2004, he voiced Cho-Cho in Karate Dog! All great choices. Chevy was actually offered the role of Lester Burnham (American Beauty) but turned it down because he really wanted Kevin Spacey to win the Academy Award. Most recently, Chevy hosted the 2007 Newport Jazz Festival. I can’t make this stuff up, people.

Best line in Three Amigos: Carmen - “We could take a walk, and you could kiss me on the veranda.”
Dusty - “Lips would be fine.”

Steve Martin (Lucky Day): Steve Martin is actually not a total loss. He’s written books and some screenplays. He was also in Father of the Bride, which will go a long way in my great affection for him. Remember The Jerk? I do. As of late, Steve had been filming another diaster of a Pink Panther movie. Interestingly enough, wikipedia says that Steve has been involved romantically with Ann Heche and Helena Bonham Carter, which I find truly amazing. Because, in Helena’s case she chose this…

over this…

To me, that’s a no brainer. But clearly not to Helena.

Best line in Three Amigos: “Oh great! Real bullets! You’re in a lot of trouble, mister!”

Martin Short (Ned Nederlander): Martin’s career has been one of ups and downs, shall we say? Marty runs the gamut from The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause to Barbie in: The Princess and the Pauper to all the wonder that is Jiminy Glick. I found that BOTH Steve Martin and Martin Short voiced characters in The Prince of Egypt. Just the titles of some of Martin’s former work inspires me, so I’ll share them with you:
Cucumber
I’m a Big Girl Now
Miss Peach of the Kelly School
We’re Back! (A Dinosaur Story [in which he played a character called Stubbs the Clown])
101 Dalmatians 2: Patch’s London Adventure

Best line in Three Amigos: “Sew, very old one! Sew like the wind!”

Fred Asparagus (The Bartender): That’s his name. Seriously. Fred appeared in such box office hits as:
Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo
Andrew Dice Clay Live!: The Diceman Cometh
Slappy and the Stinkers
Fred also has not worked since 1999, which makes me think he and Patrice have a little something going on. I then learned that Fred died of a heart attack while playing Zeus (an interesting casting choice) in movie called Just the Ticket with Andy Garcia and Andi MacDowell.

Best line in Three Amigos: Bartender – “We don’t have beer. Just tequila.”
Ned Nederlander – “What’s tequila?”
Bartender – “It’s like beer…”

Alfonso Arau (El Guapo): Alfonso just came back to the biz, after a little hiatus. He’s currently filming a movie called Butterflies and Lightning (A magical-realistic fairytale wrapped around a prophetic one-hundred-year-old patriarch, an eccentric flamenco dancer, a man dying of nostalgia, and two childhood friends cursed to fall in love with the same women for the rest of their lives). Sounds juicy. And get this. He directed A Walk in the Clouds. How’s that for left field?

Best line in Three Amigos: “Would you say that I have a pleathora of pinatas?”