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It’s been almost a week now since I’ve been riding Frances in the outside world. So far, all is well. I’ve noticed A LOT of other motorcycles on the road where I drive to and from work, so that is comforting. That means that our ratio goes up and hopefully, more people pay attention to what’s going on, instead of the opposite.

I wasn’t aware before Frances, but there are some practices and procedures in the world of two-wheel motor vehicles. Here is a little of what I have learned:

1. The Low Wave. When you pass another two-wheel motor vehicle, you are supposed to lower your hand off your steering and give them a sort of fake low five. Now so far, I haven’t encountered any other scooters, but most of the motorcycles do this as well.
a. Addendum: However, SOME motorcyclists (as I have found) do not consider scooters to be a part of the hard core two-wheel motor vehicle club (as it were). If you are sensitive (which I may or may not be), it’s best to wait for the motorcyclist to initiate the Low Wave. That way, if they wave, you can wave as well, promoting goodwill between the clans. And if they don’t, well, you can just look like you didn’t want to wave at them anyway.
b. There are also other versions of the Low Wave that I have seen. The Head Nod, which is common among those who you encounter close range, such as a parking lot. The Hand Raise, which is what we do in the Panhandle, driving along with your hands on the steering and as you pass another person, just a slight hand raise off the wheel.

2. Backpacks are for suckers. This I am learning the hard way. I thought my backpack would be totally rockin’ with Frances. However, it is the worst, especially when you make stops during your trip, as I do. Since Flex time started at work, I can’t bear to wake up earlier than 6:35am to leave to 7am. So, I tend to stop at Publix on the way to grab a piece of fruit or an Odwalla. It is a pain in the you know what to have to take my backpack off, find which pocket I put my wallet in, put it back up, put the fruit in my bag, zip the backpack back up, put it on my back again, and go. Messenger bags are the way to go. Which is why I got this little beauty, with my sweet coupons from dealtaker.com.

3. Use your blinker with care. When someone is behind you on a two lane road that eventually merges into a four laner, and you put your blinker on, I guess they assume that you will be merging immediately, even if there is no road quite yet. This guy was apparently mad at me (even though I was going 3 miles over the speed limit) and GOT ALONGSIDE ME IN MY LANE to flip me off. I hope my innocent, shocked face made him feel bad.

4. Dogs are your enemy. As in my home state, many dog owners have their pooches ride in the bed of their trucks or even in the passenger seat. When we had Phyllis, I would sometimes take her for excursions, but she didn’t really like it that much. I guess dogs are different. Anyway, dogs will appear from nowhere to bark at you when you ride a scooter. And it will terrify you and cause your heart to skip a few beats. And you might pee your pants a little. Because it will really scare you.

5. The rain is the worst. I had to scoot home in the rain the other night and it was awful. It hurts, you can’t see jack squat, and it’s colder than sitting in a tub of ice cream. You should avoid the rain at all costs.

6. Germ-X is important. Frances still has that new scooter smell, which means that her handlebars kind of reek of gasoline. This is unfortunate since I happen to tightly grip them for about 25 minutes every morning. Germ-X is the only thing I’ve found so far that adequately makes me stop smelling like a huge bucket of gasoline.

Currently, that is the extent of my knowlegde. It’s pretty fun with Frances and I get lots of compliments on her. I filled up for the first time yesterday and the people around me were asking about gas mileage. I told them that I got about 78 miles to the gallon and I topped off at $4.53 and their faces were priceless. I love it.

Also, in a not related vein, I would like to piggyback on Jared’s post about the election. I had no idea what he was talking about when he referred to people saying that “Jesus was a community organizer, Pontius Pilate was a governor.” So I did some research and it seems that some Dems are saying this in an effort to apparently make me hate them. First of all, please don’t compare Sen. Obama to Jesus Christ. Sen Obama has done a lot of good things, I’m sure, but Jesus is the holy Son of God. He was not a community organizer, but God in human form who died for our sins, and quite frankly, there is no comparison. I am just really so disgusted by this statement. It’s filthy and highly offensive. I have no idea what this woman’s intentions were, other than to piss a lot of people off, at which she succeeded.

I am just over the election. I know that just the other day I was saying how excited I am about it, but I am over it. Maybe the debates will help my apathy. I know that voting is very important, and I would never NOT vote just because the options suck. As for me, I would vote for the first dude that didn’t make constant snide remarks about the other camp. I would vote for the guy who didn’t feel the need to look like a little baby and whine and complain about everything. I would vote for a man who didn’t pander to sides and really wanted to serve the people. So, when is Brad Hickman running for president?